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Why do people who look alike tend to stick together? Whether physically or mentally, people tend to look for a partner who looks like them for many reasons. As you may have already noticed, people in couples often tend to look alike. This is not surprising, since we are more likely to be attracted to people who look like us, whether physically. In 2012, researchers proved that humans, like many animals, tend to be attracted to people who look like them.
To prove this attraction, they showed to heterosexual and homosexual men many female faces. The men had to choose which ones they found most attractive, which one they would take has a spouse for the perfect relationship, and which one they would want to be sexually intimate with. As a result, the men preferred to choose the faces with which they shared certain traits.
Other studies have also shown that we tend to be attracted to partners who look like our parents. In practice, men and women tend to choose the face of a woman who looks like their mother and vice versa.
Over time, we would also tend to look more and more like our significant other. As early as 1987, the study showed that same sex and opposite sex couples in a long term relationship who did not necessarily look alike at first, tended to share certain facial features after 25 years of marriage, even if those features were subtle.
Researchers also noted that marriages with good intimacy and openly romantic desires brought evolutionary qualities to both partners. Their facial features with time tended to resemble one another. These results were later confirmed.
It turns out that during a lifetime romantic relationship, unmarried or married couples share many events, both happy and sad. Our faces are marked by these common events, so we often share the same facial wrinkles.
This is particularly the case for laughter lines. Over time, males and females tend to adopt the same appearance, attitudes, and body language as the person with whom we share our lives and our sexual attraction.
This physical resemblance is not the only thing that influences our marital choice. Several other studies showed that we tend to be attracted to people who share the same values, sexuality, preferences, and passions as we do. The simple answer is whatever your attractiveness, or sexual orientation you will eventually look for a similar partner.
Unsurprisingly, it's often a common ground that helps create relationships. These commonalities are essential for a lasting same sex marriage or common law marriage. Researchers have linked the length of a relationship to shared values, shared sex attraction, shared belief system, and shared gender identity. It shows that the "perfect couple" have many personality traits in common, have the same political beliefs, the same sexual behaviors, and roughly the same level of education.
Then, as is the case with looks, we tend to adopt the same lifestyle as our partner. We found that when one member of the couple started to make positive changes in their lives the second half would usually follow. The spouses would together start a new sport, a new hobby, go back to school, or just basically start something new to better themselves which raised the arousal and sexual desire for each other.
"Individuals whose partners engaged in healthy behavior were significantly more likely to improve their own behavior compared to those who had a partner who was already healthy. This suggests that people are more likely to change their behavior if their partner does so as well," researchers concluded.
A couple isn't what it used to be. Once announced by engagement, then sealed by marriage, a sacred union that granted the intercourse between two sexually attracted and emotionally attracted persons.
Today, the couple is nothing more than a singular choice that is more or less suddenly imposed on the two parties concerned whatever they are same sex couples, bisexual, or the same sex. It is no longer the result of an oath pronounced before the altar for various reasons, but the simple affirmation of two individuals to form a couple, cohabitation no longer being a prerequisite.
A couple is formed when two people discover that they have a selective affinity for each other that drives them to create a lasting relationship. This phenomenon appears to both individuals as natural, inevitable, and strong enough to disrupt the individual projects they had before they met. They have the urge to have sex, build a bond, and have adventures with the others.
For Robert Neuburger, a couple is formed when "two people start to tell each other stories and those become with time their own couple story. The more time they pass with each other either good or more challenging appear and an odd fusion becomes apparent.
We can feel when a couple is right with each other, everything seems to fall in place, they have an aura that brings joy to their surrounding and it feels right. It's a feeling to look after, to pursue. It seems odd because it's not logical but since love is not something logical but something we feel deep inside ourselves it's just no longer on the same logical level as the daily reality. Your masculine or feminine side gets out to show the best team you are.
Actions are what gives meaning to a relationship. They approach the date, the small phone call or text the butterflies and the joy of having news of your soon to be significant other. Both of the two lovers believe in that feeling for real and each idealizes the other.
This narrative is reinforced, as in all beliefs, by rituals such as the celebration of the anniversary of the meeting, the wedding, Valentine's Day, aesthetic matching outfits, and other metaphorical reminders of their love, the scenario of the meeting, or important stages in their relationship.
If one of these rituals, which constantly reinforce the myth, is suppressed or forgotten, the love story can be shaken: "If he has forgotten our wedding anniversary, or has not taken me as he does every year to the mythical places where we met, then he loves me less, perhaps not at all? ».
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The same goes for the codes of the story: the way to say hello, the way to call each other, the way to knock on the door, and a whole host of distinctive signs that are difficult to detect for others, your own nonverbal language where you can finish the sentences of each other.
"My child, my sister, think how sweet it would be to go there and live together." When Baudelaire wrote these verses in 1857, was referring to the troubling resemblance that sometimes exists between two lovers?
Some people may have observed in their entourage couples who share the same physical traits and who cultivate their resemblance to the point of near twinning. Because of the time, they spend with each other they seem to take each others characteristics and mimic each other.
The phenomenon of sissy-couples, abundantly described in the literature and the arts, has been of interest to the scientific community for many years. Several studies have thus confirmed what Baudelaire and other authors have been half-wording about in their writings: individuals who choose to marry or cohabit almost always do so on the basis of physical resemblance.
"If you were asked to describe the partner of your dreams, you would never say that you wouldn't want someone as close to yourself as possible, and yet according to sociological data, it is indeed the person you are looking for and sometimes finding."
There are reasons why dating sites offer you to test your love compatibility. Looking at your ethnic origin, religious and political affiliation, social background and sexual identity can help to find someone that has the same affiliation. It is a certainty that one has a more natural tendency to project oneself with a person from the same background as oneself.
Getting the feeling of being on the same wavelength, which would facilitate the relationship, and ensure a longer life via being supported by i like minding caring person.
The study reveals that we are not so much looking for someone who looks like us but for a partner we feel we can live up to, that brings the best out of us. So we unconsciously put notes on ourselves and do the same with the other person. The goal is more to find someone who suits us than our male/female clone.
Just like a lot of us don't like our voice when listening to a recording of it, having a clone would not serve our interest because how we see each other and how we are in reality is a bit different. If you did have a perfect clone of yourself you more likely than not be annoyed by it.
Where it gets more though is that the higher your self-esteem is, whether in terms of physique, education or reliability, the more demanding you become in the choice of your partner...
If we tend to couple with someone who looks like us, it is perhaps, as the study shows, because of our monogamous model, which is almost non-existent in other living species. So, even if we only have one everlasting love, and keep it all our life, we might as well allow ourselves a few requirements to help achieve happiness.
Another possible explanation evoked by the study is the fact that the long-term need of the father and mother is necessary for the construction and education of children, which implies that both cohabit in a sustainable way. A good cocoon helps to make beautiful butterflies. Couples then rely on similarities to maximize the well being of their children.
Humans are social creatures that like to be a part of a tribe. Within that tribe, we look for people that share our feelings, thoughts, values, and sense of priorities. That's why we often look for resemblance to our eventual partners. Someone that looks like us and share the same beliefs.
Not an actual clone but that has enough look-alike characteristics to start a relationship. A couple look alike kinda relationship witch more often than not pass the test of time. You will create habits that only you two can understand. Whether you are a lesbian, gay, queer, transgender, or even asexual, having sex with a person you love is one awesome experience.
Find someone that shares the same feeling for you, and maybe wear matching couple underwear to spice it up. Or an aesthetic matching hoodie. Looking for someone that looks like you is a sure way to find matching identities and to live romantically forever after.